Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
