Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize