she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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