I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize