There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
