do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
