their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
