I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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