so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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