This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
