I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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