Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
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