38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
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