if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize
