it was like his penis was on wheels.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
