I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
