She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize