why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
