dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
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