Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
