I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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