Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
