He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
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