Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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