I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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