Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize