I'm drive I can fine osifer
I am full of burrito and curiosity
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
