As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
