it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
