You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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