you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize