oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
