Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
