Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
