he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
