you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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