nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
