Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
