do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
