3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Randomize
