We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The struggles of a small town man whore
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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