What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize