Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
it's great music for shaving your balls
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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