i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
