Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I didn't notice because vodka
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
