My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize