My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
