He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
