I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
I need moral support for this bender
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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