one two three fourrrrnication!
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
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