He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam š
Either it didnāt do much damage or Iāve lost all feeling in my asshole
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so letās just shut it down right now
Heās older
Like āhas a job and pays his billsā older or āstill watches porn on DVD because he canāt figure out the Internetā older?
Randomize