Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
